speeding

[Open to all.]

( Nightmares aren't real )

[Reactions or offlines welcome! I would have waited until the second event but I'll be out of town by then so, I apologize for the spam.]

Dear Tree,

I know I haven't written in a while. I appreciate your continued efforts to get my attention. I know my attention is pretty rad. I know. But these juvenile pranks, they get old.

If you want us to be something again, dinner and flowers are a better start. Maybe a movie. But a good one. A date at the beach, that wouldn't really be amiss either. I have standards. The thing is, I just don't think we can recapture what we used to have.

I think the spark is dead. You need to move on. Find someone new. Get on with your life.

Love and kisses,

Your Evil Overlord

P.S. One Evil Overlord seeking roommate: must like junk food, late night movies, and Guitar Hero. Inquire within. Don't ask about the rockets.

Hey, anyone seen Code?

And how long have I been gone? Not to be cliche or anything, but what day is it? Month? Year?

[The post is in Cross and Dash's handwriting, with a lot of squiggled lines, ink dots and scribbles. The handwriting is messy on both their parts.]

Hey guys [Squiggly line]

[Little circle.] We lost our other pen. Please bear with us for a moment.

Dude, seriously trying to make a point I know but as I was saying has anyone seen Bastet? She wasn't

Hey I was writing that! She didn't show for shift today, so if anyone has seen her could you

And you'll ramble around before getting to the point! tell us. We really Ramble? I'll ramble your head! We're seriously worried because she never ditches. So if

If we 'rumble', you'll lose. you see her, please check on Like you stand a chance. her. And maybe like drop us a note or something? And some pens, because this guy

Who pinned who in the remote war? That's right, not you. We'd appreciate it! Oh like you're any

[Squiggly liiiines!] Sincerely and all that, E.O. and Cross (seriously though, we're worried) gotta be fa

Thanks again! Get ready to los

((OOC: Change in hand-writing is being represented by colors for ease of reading Dash and Cross. Edit: As of this parts of the main post are very lightly struck through.))

Young Avengers don't kill.

That mean something to anyone else?

Also I am the pimp, even the damn tree thinks so.

Speaking of which, it's kinda no wonder it took out the bookstore. Am I the only one who remembers what happened with Ran? Obviously the tree doesn't like books. Man, this place is going to get all Farhenheit 451 on us, isn't it?

((ooc: strikes readable for a while, then blacked out later.))

Dear Tree,

Getting kinda sick of being thrown into jail. Knock it off.

Also, the breakfast cereal? That's sacred. Don't fuck with it again.

-Evil Overlord

P.S. Anyone know what a Magneto is? I think my cereal's trying to say he's my daddy.

Dear Fishbowl,

No. I am not on a boat. Nor does the dude look like a lady. And, in fact, I'm already king, so there's no need to work on my roar, right?

I understand you must be bored and lonely, without me to write to you every day, but making wax statues of me is creepy and stalkerish. Just so you know.

I'm glad we had this little chat.

Love and all that,

Your Evil Overlord

P.S. Seriously. Creepy.

P.P.S. Cross, we're out of socks. Again.

Dear Tree,

I think we're on nickname basis by now, yes? You don't mind if I call you Tree, right? I mean, with the way you treat us like your bitches, I think the whole formality thing is pretty moot.

So, right, on topic. Thanks for the shiny, but really, what's with your recent obsession with clothing? Gothic Lolita? Togas? Sailor uniforms?

Can I at least have my goddamn underwear back?

No fucking love,

Evil Overlord

P.S. Sky, Cross, I got one of the mystical sparklestones. One of you two wanna hold my hand while I follow the white rabbit? Want said it's a good idea to only use these when you have someone there.