Tenth Rerun - Exploding People [Bees Remix]

[speeding]

Dear Tree,

I know I haven't written in a while. I appreciate your continued efforts to get my attention. I know my attention is pretty rad. I know. But these juvenile pranks, they get old.

If you want us to be something again, dinner and flowers are a better start. Maybe a movie. But a good one. A date at the beach, that wouldn't really be amiss either. I have standards. The thing is, I just don't think we can recapture what we used to have.

I think the spark is dead. You need to move on. Find someone new. Get on with your life.

Love and kisses,

Your Evil Overlord

P.S. One Evil Overlord seeking roommate: must like junk food, late night movies, and Guitar Hero. Inquire within. Don't ask about the rockets.

Comments

[speeding]

I'm a laid back guy, really I am. But you've gotta have standards, GG. Or people will walk right over you.

[live_ringer]

GG?

Hm, I can't argue with that, but be careful. Hell hath no fury like a Tree scorned.

[speeding]

Big G is taken, Green Eyes and Irish are different people, so yeah. You're stuck sounding like a Saturday morning cartoon character. Them's the breaks.

[live_ringer]

A cartoon character or a middle-aged blonde woman from New Jersey.

I don't suppose I could appeal to get it cut down to one G all on its own, hm?

[speeding]

Oh I dunno, middle aged blonde chick from NJ kinda fits you, don't you think?

But I could take bribes.

[live_ringer]

I'd say it fits about as well as that uniform you were wearing when I first got here.

[Yes, it's an old jab. But he finally has cause to use it!]

And what sorts of bribes would these be?

[speeding]

Low blow dude. Low.

I take bribes in any form of alcoholic substance and or Mexican food.

[live_ringer]

What can I say, one good blow to the masculinity deserves another.

I can't say much for my burrito making skills, but I can probably swing the first. Got a preference?

[speeding]

Hey, you picked your named yourself. I was forced into that. Under duress.

Tequila. Rum. Jack Daniels. I will take whatever you have on hand, my good man. I am a benevolent dictator.

[live_ringer]

Uh huh. I'm sure your arm must really be aching from all that twisting that had to be done.

I believe I've got some tequila on hand and definitely some whiskey. We'll see what comes of it.